frischlinge | by brechnuss
justlikeaMaze: 28
So I realize I haven’t talked much about my pregnancy, not only on here but anywhere or to anyone. I think it’s because I honestly still have no idea what to make of it. I’m 28 weeks along, and the past 6 months has gone by extremely fast. My boyfriend and I were originally set on the placing this…
Krissy you’ll probably hate me for having to reblog this to say anything, but I honestly spent at least 5 minutes looking for a message link and couldn’t see one. I considered Facebook, but I hate that so much so yeah.
I’m honestly so freaking happy that you finally have said at least something about it, other than the fact that you are pregnant. The only person I’ve spoken to lately that could possibly have any connection with you is PJ, and he’s as dumbfounded as I am when I just ask curious questions. I thought about just going to you before, but I think I was too scared because I didn’t know if you wanted to talk about it to anybody, but I think this post has made me brave enough.
I just want you to know that from the second I found out you were preggers, I was immediately thinking you would choose adoption from what you’ve said about how you didn’t really want kids. Someone else confirmed that for me, so I was very, very proud of you for at least thinking of something like that given the current circumstances. On the other hand, though, I’d be just as proud if you decided to keep him.
I won’t go into detail about anything else in public like this, but I just wanted you to know that I miss you dearly. It might seem odd and completely random, but I think about you a lot, which is why literally every time I see PJ, I ask something about you even though I know he has no answers. I would imagine that you’re extremely busy with work and appointments, but I just hope you know that I’m still here and I still love you to pieces. You were my best friend for the longest time and it sucks that this doucher I’m still with is what made me run away from you in the first place.
Well I’m not really quite sure how to respond to this. All I guess I can say is thank you. I miss you too. If you ever want to talk, you can text me. Not sure if you have my number?
Om nom nom nom. I’ve been craving fresh mozzarella for quite some time now.
28
So I realize I haven’t talked much about my pregnancy, not only on here but anywhere or to anyone. I think it’s because I honestly still have no idea what to make of it. I’m 28 weeks along, and the past 6 months has gone by extremely fast. My boyfriend and I were originally set on the placing this baby for adoption. There are pretty obvious, and less obvious reasons for this. I’m seventeen, not exactly the year of my life I thought I’d start a family. I haven’t finished school, I work at a coffee shop, almost all of my money goes to rent, bills, gas and food, and I’m just ill equipped for a baby. That barely skims why I was considering adoption. However, about a month ago my boyfriend mentioned to me that he was having second thoughts about keeping our child. I immediately went into panic mode. The thought terrified me. Since then, we’ve talked, shared our ideas and thoughts with each other, family, and the adoption agency. We’ve come to the conclusion that together we’re more than capable of being a mommy and a daddy. Both Daniel and I have a love and understanding for each other that I don’t think many other people get the chance to experience. I have no doubt whatsoever that this child will get every ounce of the love he deserves from both of us. I still have yet to make “the decision”. And I’m just scared. I know I can be a great mom. I just wish I didn’t have to rely on anyone for help with my baby, and at this point in my life I’m going to need a lot of help. I think this is the only thing holding me back from saying “yes, we’re keep him”. I don’t want to have to rely on the government for financial support, and medicaid for insurance. Or family for care taking while we’re at work. Although, I guess every new mom needs help. If you’ve ever been in my position, you know how damn hard it is. Daniel used to be the only guy on my mind. Now there’s two, him and his son. I’m constantly, and I mean 100% of my day, thinking about this child. I don’t know what to do. I want to say yes, yes I’m keeping my son. I just keep getting pulled back in the other direction. There are so many people more ready than me. At the same time, this is my son. Something myself and the most genuine guy I know created. It’s truly a beautiful thing. My thoughts just run and run in all different directions. I know I’m probably not making a lot of sense. If only answers would just come to me. It is getting closer and closer, and I need to make a decision. I’m scared, and excited. I love this baby. Just as much as I love his dad. Either way he’ll know that.
It’s kind of an odd thing, being pregnant. The typical woman in the first few months gets a little sick, or maybe really sick. I felt pretty awesome the first few months. In fact, a lot of the first two I didn’t even know I was pregnant. I maybe was a little more tired than normal, but no morning sickness really at all. I’m told I’m lucky. I also haven’t had any odd cravings. Cravings, yes, but nothing out of the ordinary. Yogurt is my best friend right now. My fourth/fifth month I felt amazing. Energized and healthy. Now I’m six months and still feel okay. No sickness really. Just a lot of back pain and foot pain. If I’m sitting for more than five minutes my back just starts killing. I hate it. Oh! Heartburn… that has sucked the whole time. I have never had heartburn in my life until now. It really really sucks. Other than that I just feel fat. I really didn’t start showing until about 4 and half months. It all came over night, and before that I was just little. I feel as if everything has grown over night. My stomach, my boobs, my thighs and butt. Not to mention my doctor says I’m gaining too much. Bleh. I guess it makes me feel better that most of my customers think I look tiny for six months. I get “You’re so cute!” or “Aww look at your little belly” almost every day at work. It’s just odd because I’ve never felt this unattractive in my life. Baby is kicking a lot. It’s so weird. It started out as just kicking, now it’s full on gymnastics in my stomach. I’m sure it’ll get much worse. But it is really weird feeling a human moving around inside of you. It’s a good reminder to me that he’s still in there, growing and everything is okay.
Meh… I’m just ranting now. You’ll probably see more of these random pregnancy posts. Especially when I have to go on bed rest and Daniel will be at work all day. But at least now I got it all out there. All my thoughts and where I stand with being pregnant.
Goodnight.
jdel:
Fifteen-year-old Kent Manning, left, and his sister Libby, 18, react with their father, who asked not to be identified, after they were told by police that there was no hope of finding Kent and Libby’s mother alive in a collapsed building following a 6.3-magnitude earthquake Tuesday, in Christchurch, New Zealand, Wednesday, Feb. 23, 2011.
I’m so sorry :’(
Egypt. Bahrain. Libya. New Zealand. Wisconsin. The world has been getting smaller for quite some time now. But it’s no longer getting smaller.
We’re here. We’ve arrived. It’s 2011. The world is small.
Don’t normally re-blog things like this, but a great point. Terrible things like this happen every day all over the world, but we finally live in a time when an earthquake on the other side of the world doesn’t have to be relegated to a small column below the fold of our local newspaper.
Still, heartbreaking.
Odd. I was just telling a coworker yesterday that earthquakes don’t often kill people. Maybe I was wrong. Here’s to hoping Utah’s due earthquake isn’t too big, and doesn’t kill anyone. This is very sad.
Basically
I’m 5 months pregnant now. I feel like my tummy is going to explode. I swear it’s growing by the second, along with my boobs. I feel pretty good, haven’t really been sick or anything. I just can’t wait to get this over with.
I could really go for something sweet right now. Godiva raspberry cordials would do it…
Being pregnant feels like having the munchies all the time.
'consequence' - a theme for tumblr by hey dragon.
